attitude of gratitude

I have so much to be thankful for.  Tonight however, I'm stressed and anxious and having a hard time FEELING thankful.  My brain wants to concentrate on my son.  On how much I hate third grade.  On how discouraged I am to see my son so discouraged.  I don't feel thankful.  I feel overwhelmed.

It was years ago when I was convicted about my attitude that focused on what I didn't have instead of what I did have.  After completing 30 days of thankfulness on Facebook, I was convicted that I should be concentrating on the good in my life all the time not just in November.  I went straight to searching for the perfect journal.  I needed an Attitude of Gratitude journal to continue to focus on the good in my life.

I began writing in it all the things I was thankful for. I'm so glad I did because not long after my life fell apart.  Some days through the tears I would force myself to think of something good in that day.  There were more than a few days that the only thing I could think of was that I had a cup of coffee that morning, or a hug from my boys, or a song on the radio.

I discovered through that season that gratitude isn't a feeling, it is an action.  Like love, sometimes I will feel the gratitude and sometimes I must choose it when I don't feel it.  Last year a friend gave me the book One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp.  It is a great book that expressed so beautifully something that God has already been doing in my own heart.

I have a dry erase board at my desk at work that I write things I'm thankful for.  If you are on my Facebook you see it weekly.  It doesn't mean my life is perfect.  Heaven forbid that anyone sees my pictures or my status updates and thinks I have it all together.  I don't.  There are plenty of days like today that my gratitude springs from the choice that I have made to trust that God is good even when life isn't.

my Attitude of Gratitude Journal and my Gratitude board 

So today, in the middle of my funk, in the middle of my overwhelm, I will choose to be thankful.  Today in particular I am thankful that Hubby took me to work in the snow this morning so that I would be able to walk out of work to a warm car this afternoon. I am thankful for my space heater radiating warmth as I type.  I'm thankful that I'm here and I'm thankful for a place to share my heart.

Your turn, what are you thankful for? 

Things our sons need to know because our daughters need to hear

As my sons get older I realize there are some things they be to hear.  There are things I've said since they started talking like, "Marry a girl who loves your mama" and "Someday when you are a dad the 2 greatest things you can do for your children is introduce them to Jesus and love their mama."  The list of things I think my boys need to hear is growing longer. 

Last month I was trying on clothes and seeking my husbands opinion on the new clothes.  I noticed my son intently watching our dialog.   I looked him in the eyes and told him something every boy needs to know.

"Son,  someday there will be a beautiful girl in your life.  She will ask you about her clothes,  probably often. Learn from your daddy's example. In that moment your job is to remind her that it is not the clothes that make her beautiful but rather she makes the clothes beautiful.  She is asking about the clothes because she wants to know you find her beautiful. Your opinion will matter to her more than anyone else's so tell her often how beautiful she is."

He shrugged but I felt like he actually heard it.  I'm sure he filed it in his brain somewhere.  Someday I hope that my daughter in laws will feel as amazingly loved, treasured and protected as my husband has made me feel.  I'm so grateful for the example that Hubby has set for our sons and for the gentle way that he loves me and protects me and I pray that my sons will grow up to love their wives in the same way. 

what I learned from helping my son

My baby has been struggling.  For several months he has randomly started crying and telling me he is sad. Recently it is becoming more and more frequent.  He never knows why he is sad or what is causing him to go from laughing to crying in a matter of minutes.  The other day he climbed in my lap, stroked my hair and said, "Mamma, I'm just sad."

I have no answers or cures for him.  But I happen to be struggling with the same thing currently so I hugged him tightly and told him that I get sad for no reason sometimes too.  I grabbed my Bible that I had been reading before he came in and read Philippians 4:4-8 to him.

Rejoice in the Lord always.  I will say it again: Rejoice!

We can choose to have joy.

Let your gentleness be evident to all.  The Lord is near.

God is near us, Baby.

Do not be anxious about anything, 

That means we aren't supposed to worry.

but in everything, by prayer and petition, 

with thanksgiving, present your request to God.

And the peace of God which transcends all understanding

will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.

That means that God gives us peace in our hearts that is bigger than our brains can understand.

Finally, brothers, whatever is true,

whatever is noble,

whatever is right,

whatever is pure,

whatever is lovely

 whatever is admirable

if anything is excellent or praiseworthy

think on these things.

Baby, that means that God wants us to spend our time thinking about the things 

in our lives that we are thankful for, for the blessings He gives us, and every good thing.

Tell me something you are thankful for, something that makes you smile.  "I don't know, Mamma.  I can't think of anything."  Well, I can tell you something  that makes me smile.  You make me smile.  I'm thankful for you.  Now it is your turn.

You.

Coffee in my Christmas mug.

My monkeys.

That our heater works.

Playing with my friends at recess.

Hugs and kisses.

Brothers.

The conversation continued for several minutes.  And then his sweet voice says, "Mamma, I still feel sad."  I know, Baby.  We will still get sad sometimes.  What we need to do is hold on to those things we are thankful for, those things that make us smile, until  the sadness passes.  And at some point the sadness will pass.  Just keep holding on to those good things until the sadness passes. 

I don't know how long it will be until my sadness passes, but I will continue to greet the day with intentional thankfulness until the sadness passes.  I will continue to hold on to the things that are true, noble, worthy of praise and trust that God is indeed near and that He will indeed guard my heart and mind with His peace.