Even though I walk

The Lord has been reminding me of something very simple and very important lately.  After the Newtown shooting, like every parent in America I hugged my kids a little tighter on their first day back at school.  Like everyone else, I prayed a little prayer "God protect them.  Please keep this from OUR school."

On the day that the shooting happened, I was in our school to volunteer.  We were on level 2 lockdown.  It was a very tense and somber mood with the staff.  I talked with a teacher for a few minutes.  We talked about how the principal was going to sent a message to parents, letting them know that our school had a plan.  She looked at me and said, "Of course our school has a plan.  Colorado was the first state to start implementing "shooting plans" after Columbine."

Sad as it is that we need a plan for these horrible and evil events, it was comforting to hear that our school has a plan. Just a couple of days later I was flipping though my Bible.  I didn't have a destination in mind.  I wanted comfort from its pages but couldn't really focus on what I was reading much.  As I flipped through, my eye caught Psalm 23.  It is a passage that I have been able to say since I was 3 years old.  But until that morning, the words had never impressed me in this way. 

Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,

I will fear no evil for you are with me.

Psalm 23:4

And there it was.  Even in the midst of death, even in the midst of evil, I won't fear the evil around me because God is with me.  Every time that lump starts in my throat, I remind myself that God is with me, that He is with my family, even when we walk through the valleys.  Even when we walk through death.  Even when there is evil around us.  He is still there.  Even if we ever have to live through (or Heaven forbid die through) a mass shooting in a place that should have been safe.  

As I said in my last post, I can't promise safety, but I can promise that God is with us.  I can't promise life won't throw us curve balls, but I can promise that there is no curve ball that will change the character of God.  I can't promise it won't be hard, but I can promise He will be with us during the pain.  

what I learned from helping my son

My baby has been struggling.  For several months he has randomly started crying and telling me he is sad. Recently it is becoming more and more frequent.  He never knows why he is sad or what is causing him to go from laughing to crying in a matter of minutes.  The other day he climbed in my lap, stroked my hair and said, "Mamma, I'm just sad."

I have no answers or cures for him.  But I happen to be struggling with the same thing currently so I hugged him tightly and told him that I get sad for no reason sometimes too.  I grabbed my Bible that I had been reading before he came in and read Philippians 4:4-8 to him.

Rejoice in the Lord always.  I will say it again: Rejoice!

We can choose to have joy.

Let your gentleness be evident to all.  The Lord is near.

God is near us, Baby.

Do not be anxious about anything, 

That means we aren't supposed to worry.

but in everything, by prayer and petition, 

with thanksgiving, present your request to God.

And the peace of God which transcends all understanding

will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.

That means that God gives us peace in our hearts that is bigger than our brains can understand.

Finally, brothers, whatever is true,

whatever is noble,

whatever is right,

whatever is pure,

whatever is lovely

 whatever is admirable

if anything is excellent or praiseworthy

think on these things.

Baby, that means that God wants us to spend our time thinking about the things 

in our lives that we are thankful for, for the blessings He gives us, and every good thing.

Tell me something you are thankful for, something that makes you smile.  "I don't know, Mamma.  I can't think of anything."  Well, I can tell you something  that makes me smile.  You make me smile.  I'm thankful for you.  Now it is your turn.

You.

Coffee in my Christmas mug.

My monkeys.

That our heater works.

Playing with my friends at recess.

Hugs and kisses.

Brothers.

The conversation continued for several minutes.  And then his sweet voice says, "Mamma, I still feel sad."  I know, Baby.  We will still get sad sometimes.  What we need to do is hold on to those things we are thankful for, those things that make us smile, until  the sadness passes.  And at some point the sadness will pass.  Just keep holding on to those good things until the sadness passes. 

I don't know how long it will be until my sadness passes, but I will continue to greet the day with intentional thankfulness until the sadness passes.  I will continue to hold on to the things that are true, noble, worthy of praise and trust that God is indeed near and that He will indeed guard my heart and mind with His peace.