Part of what makes public writing hard is determining where my story ends and someone else's begins. I am me. I am also a wife, mother, daughter, sister, and friend. The wonderful thing about life is how our stories intersect. Where our stories intersect is also sometimes hard.
Sometimes I want to share how people have shown up in my story. But when they show up in a way that is painful it is hard for me to write about it. I'm hitting a lot of that right now. I'm not sure which parts are ok to type out and hit publish. I want to be transparent and authentic but I don't want to hurt others, even if they have hurt me.
I want to share stories about my kids. They are nearing adulthood and I want them to have the choice of how their stories are shared. When they were little it felt different but now it often feels like it's their stories to tell not mine.
So when I don't talk about how others are interacting in my story, I forget how to use my voice. I need to remember who I am. I need to remember the things that I am passionate about. I need to hear my own voice again. It seems like this is going to be a bigger thing than just writing again because I can't write without rediscovering my voice.
I have controversial opinions. And I hate controversy. So publishing my thoughts and opinions seems risky also. It is shaping up to be an interesting ride in finding myself.
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